Creating a Safe Place on the Inside

  I’ve wanted to write about this topic for a long time. Our society has been changing over the last five years in ways that are disturbing to me. One of these ways is the emphasis on creating “safe places” for students on college campuses to shield themselves from uncomfortable or dissenting viewpoints. This is […]

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Being Compassionate as You Parent, Helps Your Marriage

  How does being compassionate with yourself as a parent help your marriage? Good question. First, remember that everything is connected. How you care for yourself as you parent affects your relationship with yourself, your child, and yes…your spouse. We can be pretty hard on ourselves as parents We don’t mean to, we simply don’t […]

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Compassion Builds the Parent-Child Bond

Parenting is Hard We face huge challenges trying to effectively parent in this ever changing, difficult world. It is hard to live in, never mind raise children in. Being a parent gives us indescribable joy, and also zaps us of everything—energy, finances, time, and sometimes even confidence. Building emotional closeness with your children is the […]

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Getting Your Kids to Listen

We all want to be listened to, respected, and taken seriously by our loved ones, friends, workmates…and yes, our kids! It’s hard when they don’t listen to us, especially since we have such good things to say! The good news is that there are lots of ways to up the chances our children will pay […]

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Teaching Kids Compassionate Self-Talk

Last Sunday I had the privilege of talking with some young children about how to talk to themselves compassionately when they do something wrong. There were about 12 kids there and it was so fun to talk with them. I started by asking, “How many of you have broken something important of your mom or […]

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Extending Compassion over the Holidays

  Christmas is just around the corner, and if you’re like me, you’re probably exhausted. This year, I encourage you treat yourself with care and compassion, and extend that to your children and grandchildren too. Our hopes for the holidays, can be a mixed blessing. They help us plan what’s important to us, but can […]

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Setting Boundaries and Consequences with Compassion

It’s not easy to find the sweet spot of setting boundaries and applying consequences without accidentally shaming our kids. Setting limits with compassion is so important for our children’s self-esteem, ability to set their own boundaries, and relationship with themselves. Developmental 101 Simply put, children come out as a “blob.” They are wonderful creations made […]

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You Don’t Have to Be Perfect!

Good News! Most of us live under the burden of trying to be perfect – at work, at home, in our relationships…everywhere. It is a heavy weight that can discourage and paralyze us, especially regarding our children, no matter how old they are. We have a false belief that in order to have a positive […]

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The Enemy of Self-Compassion is Shame

Picture © Amir Kaljikovic | Dreamstime.com

  Let that sentence sink in. The enemy of self-compassion is shame. We want to be compassionate with ourselves, but our shameful self-talk blocks the kindness we want to extend to ourselves. It would be so wonderful to talk to ourselves kindly about the mistakes we’ve made, and the regrets we have. The problem is […]

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Why Our Children Need to Learn Self-Compassion

http://kimfredrickson.com/2017/10/10/why-our-children-need-to-learn-self-compassion/

Our children desperately need to learn how to be compassionate with themselves. They are vulnerable to being hard on themselves because they are constantly learning new things, which involves lots of failure. Teaching self-compassion is not self-pity, where we wallow in the shame of what we have done. It is not self-complacency, where we just […]

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